"Your young voices sing about no one"
So, I am not sure if I chronicled this or not, but I shall now.
I'm currently moving out of Charlotte, because this apartment is shit and my mom doesn't want me to be here in this shit (which is how I'm looking at it). I'm moving back to Kernersville. It seems fitting to go back to a place with good friends and demons to fight with them near your side.
The only thing is, I found a place. A nice place and I'm moving in next monday. How much fun!...?
It is less than a mile from where Kelsea (used to?) live(s). I have no clue where she is now but I have a feeling we will bump into each other at some point. Maybe I could try to convince myself I don't care but then I'd be lying. I mean, I'm not going to her house with a bunch of flowers and a sorry note. That doesn't work, nor do I have any inclination to do a stupid stunt like that. The only thing is, I can plan all I'd like for when (hopefully "if" rather) we do bump into each other, but I know now that I will freeze up like an idiot.
I guess thats the best reaction anyway. Something I find even more amusing to think about is that I know by now that she is most certainly not even worrying about such things. I would hope not, at the least. Which means, dear fellas, that I am more of a softie than her. Which I find amusing.
Hey, I'm a cancer. LAWL
No, moving on (pun, LOL), I'll be living with billy and some woman for super cheap for a nice place. I have a job transfer, and currently enough funds to buy a few classes in forsyth tech. Not enough for an associates, which is what I'm saving for. I'm smoking a lot less. I didn't even notice it until Jimmy said something. I guess its starting to leave me for good. I'd actually rather not think about and let it go (oh how I've overused that technique). I haven't drank in probably two months, actually abstaining from drinking at the last party. I haven't smoked pot in...jeez Febuary at the least. I remember doing it on Valentines day. The end of all the ends, lol. Anyways, my point is that I feel so much healthier, and I'm starting to get more fit. I've actually got tone. I seem to feel myself smiling more. It feels good.
Its a tad lonely, but it feels good. I don't need a crazy person to feel sane.
EDIT: WOAHHH stop there. I recognize how many times I range from up to down, this sort of post to my old dark ones. So I don't mean to be repetitive, but doing this helps me keep up with my mood changes.
And maybe you are not counting, but I am. They are growing farther apart, and the dark ones are dropping in frequency. So at the least, I am getting control.
